We have seven grand kids. “Say thank you” in that sing-song voice is heard over and over again from their parents – over and over—and over. I am glad they are being taught, but seriously... they are clearly NOT always thankful.
For the last year I sweated over sewing some PJ’s together for Kate the six-year-old. She picked out the pattern and the mermaid fabric. Over and over she asked me about the PJ’s. Are they ready? Can I have them? Little did she know that one, her little sister had torn up the first pattern and I had to buy a new one. Then, two, I got distracted – and then, three, the instructions were harder than I thought so I got sick of those PJ's. Then, four, I made masks instead. Finally, I finished the #$* Mermaid PJ’s. I drove the 20 minutes and delivered them. Kate was much more interested in playing with her friends than trying on my PJ’s. When she finally did, the elastic was tight on the sleeves. The pants were too short. But she looked at the carpet in her room and sadly said “Thank you.” Seriously I had to laugh. She was no more thankful for those PJ’s than I am for Covid 19!
So here is the difference – she’s six and I am ... a bit older. She has her entire life ahead of her and mine is mostly behind. The only benefit for a lack of gratitude that she has ever experienced is a consequence from mom or dad. For me, though? That inward focus is UGLY and looks a lot like a baby with a temper tantrum. I hate what Covid has done to us. We are struggling with relationships. Friends are sick. Schools and health care facilities are scrambling.
In the November 14, 2014 (six years before Covid, I know) issue of Forbes Magazine Amy Morin wrote regarding the proven research for the benefits of gratitude:
· Gratitude opens the door to more relationships. ...
· Gratitude improves physical health. ...
· Gratitude improves psychological health. ...
· Gratitude enhances empathy and reduces aggression. ...
· Grateful people sleep better. ...
· Gratitude improves self-esteem.
Yep I agree to every single benefit. Mentors and coaches have a huge advantage of experience, sort of our own proven research, to say that you will not be successful if you cannot have a heart that has the potential for gratitude. We have tried it and it doesn’t work. Your relationships will not flourish. Your physical health will suffer as well as your emotional well-being. Sleep will come easier and you will grow in your personal confidence.
So as your mentor/coach, trust me. Grow up and “Say thank you.” Your success depends on it.